Week 1: Church groups for me and you

I don't really want to go according to the discussion guidelines because i want to be sincerely me in my blog entries so here goes . . . .

Given my sincerest attempt to be utterly honest in my entry , i just must add in the fact that i'm in fact typing out this entry with a crest-fallen mood due to issues pertaining to my youth group Catholic Youth Fellowship . CYF for short . No cause for much worries , i'll still deliver a balanced value-added blog entry .

Joachim Lai was the one who threw me enough reasons to join CYF . Ethelbert was the first one who showed me what true warmth from friends meant . In that manner , i slither my way into this group of people who just want to know more about God .

Sessions to me were truly fantastic . Those sessions were of truly some high quality and they touched me in ways which i could hardly try describing . They made me regret those wrongs i've done and yet cling on even more tightly to the hands of Jesus . CYF as a whole , taught me how to be a person who i can be personally proud of . The other me before i joined CYF is one who won't bother to think much before throwing crucifixes down my 12-storey high HDB flat due to my bad anger management . The Xavier after that knew how to stop and pause ( 60% of the time ) before doing something sinful . Well , the inital journey was really surfing well and healthy .

The high time was my first year of leadership , when i started realising that i've got "power" i didn't had before . I realised that i can actually go right up to new members and make them feel welcomed without feeling bashful about it . I realised that people started to take notice of me . I realised that some decisions that i make can change people's perception of CYF to a great extent . It was boom time for me . It was a year of high spirituality and many charged and emotional moments where tears of joy and sadness flow , quite literally . Overall , before the year was over , it was one of many notable achievements of touching many member's lives and enriching the life that i had . Sure , there's times when i had to let go of friends whom i thought i'll never let go and times when sad days arrives in relentless truckloads , but it ended , eventually . And thank goodness they really did .

With the onslaught of the 2nd year rushing in , my life in CYF changed so dramatically i can't recount the million changes . Instead of reaching out to even more newer members , the main preoccupation was reaching out to the new leaders who stepped up to serve . It was hard drill . It was truly hard work . Those whom i've personally groomed the previous year turn their backs to me as they looked for new company . I can't say much , it was literally tearing of my flesh and a couple times worse than that . There's so much pressure for the older leaders to be exemplary . It was as though we ought to be saints or something like that . Well , i almost apologised for being a human and not someone who has a halo above his head . Mind-boogling it is , truly . For one doesn't know what to do anymore . To give a more balanced point , it was still rewarding , this duty in CYF . Won't change it for any other youth group ( for now ) . For the life of me , i can't believe Mister Lai held on to this duty for 3 years . I swear he got some God-bestowed-personally talents that eludes my greatest effort to search for them .

Well , i guess being in CYF does have it pros and cons . But i did learn something which i will always remember and never let it out of my mental vision . Which is that i will never let go of God's loving hands . Thats some big words coming out of someone who could literally hurl crucifixes down a 12-storey flat . But ya , at least CYF did achieve its aim , for me , after all , to be closer to our Father and his unyielding love and never losing faith in him . Well , at least i've gleamed off some treasures after all , and i think , this must be the greatest treasure . This is in my most sincere tone ever . Thats all . Gnite .